


Not Telemarketers

by AithuzahFic (veritably_mad)



Series: follow fic [1]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Crack, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-25
Updated: 2014-06-25
Packaged: 2018-02-06 03:40:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1843003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/veritably_mad/pseuds/AithuzahFic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are people on the lawn. Arthur suspects they're telemarketers. (They aren't.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Telemarketers

**Author's Note:**

> Wrote this on tumblr to celebrate/thank my first 100 followers on my [Merlin blog](http://aithuzah.tumblr.com).

"Arthur, come look at this," Merlin called from the living room, kneeling on the couch to peer through the blinds. Pressed up against the glass, he made the plastic slats crumple between his chest and the window. He seemed fascinated by their front lawn. 

"Is this another one of your tricks? Trying to get me to do yard work again?" Arthur asked. He added another spoonful of sugar to his tea while Merlin was distracted and couldn’t see that he didn’t like it as plain as he pretended. "You’re the servant, you should take care of all that."

"No, you prat. There’s…well, just come and see, all right?" He glanced over his shoulder long enough to add, "And it’s the 21st century. I’d be an  _assistant_ , now, not a servant.”

"If you insist." With a long-suffering sigh, exaggerated to ensure Merlin would hear it, he joined his "assistant" at the window. "What am I looking at?"

Merlin gave him a look that very much implied Merlin’s thoughts on Arthur’s eyesight, and possibly his intelligence. “You don’t see them?”

"See who -  _oh._ Them.”

There were people on their lawn.

"What the hell are they doing here?" he blurted, tugging open a gap in the slats for a better view. There were dozens of them, all camped out on the grass and chatting amongst themselves, occasionally looking at the house with mild interest.

"I don’t know!" Merlin said, agitated. "There has to be a hundred of them, at least. Sometimes they throw paper hearts at the door."

"What for?"

"Ask  _them_ , not me.”

One of the people closer to the window noticed the two of them staring. She waved, smiling cheerfully, as if this was all perfectly normal.

Merlin waved back before Arthur slapped his hand away. 

Merlin yelped. “What was that for? They seem nice!”

"We don’t know what they want," he hissed back. "They could be telemarketers!"

Merlin let his head  _thunk_  against the window frame. “You’re thinking of door-to-door salesmen,” he said. “ _Tele_ marketers work over the  _tele_ phone.”

"Salesmen, then!" Merlin was generally quite patient about teaching Arthur about modern life. Arthur was generally less patient about learning the useless, random things like popular musicians and which word went with what type of annoyance.

"I don’t think so, Arthur." He pushed away from the couch and approached the front door, ignoring Arthur’s protests.

"Hello? Erm, what are you all doing here?" he was saying when Arthur jumped off the couch to join him, as battle-ready as he could be without a sword or armor or weapons of any kind.

"Hi!" said the girl who’d waved. "We’re your followers!"

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos, comments, and constructive critiques are always welcome and much appreciated.
> 
> (I'm greedy for feedback, I admit it.)


End file.
